Greetings Inchoates,

Gruesom Grimp, here, with a report from the front lines of A Band of Orcs first show among humans.

First off, the battle terrain favored the brutal aural onslaught the humans gathered at the Felton Asylum came to witness with three giant stone columns in the back-ground and an appropriate hill-fort stage on which the major ear-raids were to take place.  Our legions prepared for the coming battle by sparing at Spaghetti Wrestling and Moped Jousting, in order to perfect their skill and hone their defenses.

Tater Famine began phase one of the raid by lulling the humans in the vicinity into a false sense of complacency with a folky acoustic set.  They successfully executed their part o' the plan with vigor and drunken battle joy.  Next came Teraton bringin' the heavy artillery with their brand of sludgy, doomy metal, against which the puny human ear-drumz stood no chance, such did they show their power..  Then the Back-up Razor moved in slicing and cutting their way through the fray with angry punk-rock precision.  Many bled from wounds they did not know they even suffered!

After this sharp assault it came time to unleash the fabulous undead phase of the plan with the Stellar Corpses, whose skill in wielding the sword of psychobilly rock none can touch!  This proved too much for the weak-eared humans in the area, who begged for reinforcements from the Sheriff of Feltingham and his levies to check the advance of the raiding party.  They threatened to bring on a strong attack with fines and confiscation of equipment, but the fearless leadership of the Creeps Motocycle Club devised a new plan, suggesting that the remaining forces of A Band of Orcs and ArnoCorps retreat and regroup at the peerless General Timmy's bar, the Jury Room.  So we gathered up our instruments of war and holed-up at the Jury Room where the Raid continued for the rest of the night.

A Band of Orcs, for the first time in this puny human world, staged their attack on frail human ear-drums and won many slaves for the coming Domination with their furious sonic onslaught, frightening visages, and chaotic jumping about.  The human levies in the raid almost broke rank when a fight erupted among our own troops, which threatened to diminish the strength of the assault, but the oRcs were able to quell the minion-on-minion violence and refocus their efforts on the task at hand—totally oRcking out and having a fantastic time!

Speaking of fantastic, the last wave of the assault on frail human ear-drums came from action adventure heroes ArnoCorps, whose ballsy hardcore attack did not suffer at all from the smallness of the battle-stage.  In fact, their special forces training and unparalleled military discipline allowed them to deliver an epic performance from the mosh pit.

Let us sacrifice to the demon-dragon Gzoroth for A Band of Orcs first victory over puny human ear-drums, and we welcome amongst our legions all the new slaves and minions gained from this raid.

The next raid will take place on Monday, October 27^th at the Elbo Room in LACE>San FranciscoLACE> with death metal legends Master and their label-mates Estuary.

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Until the Domination, oRc on!!!!

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Yours unruly,

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Gruesom Grimp

Band Manager & Chaos Pundit